I'm Drunk!

The trooper stops a car that's swerving all over
the road. "Step out of the car. I am going to
need you to take a breathalyzer test."
"I can't. You see, I have very bad asthma, and
blowing into that thing can set off an attack."
"All right. Then you're going to have to take a
blood test."
"I Can’t do that either. I'm a hemophiliac. If a
wound is opened I could bleed to death."
"Okay. I will need a urine sample."
"Sorry, I also have diabetes. That could push my
sugar count really low."
"Fine. So just get out of the car and walk a
straight line for me."
"I can't do that either."
"Why in the world not??!"
"Because I’m drunk!"