ELEMENTARY!

Elementary school test question: "Name the four major
directions."
One student's answer: "Listen carefully. Write neatly.
Sit up straight. Raise your hand."

You know, today's appliances just can't compete with the
quality of those made years ago. For example, I've still
got the iron from when I was first married forty years
ago, and there’s not a thing wrong with it. Of course,
it's never been out of the box ...

With all the staff on vacation, the cemetery was able to
manage with a skeleton crew. But it was quite an
undertaking.
  
It's always sad when poor people try to bring cats along
for space travel. They often can't handle the Cat Astro
Fee.


I'm sick of those pesky stinging insect mounds in my
yard. I'm considering  a move to the Lesser Antilles.