Nuggets that might make U laugh

Dogma: A puppy's mom

Gardening: A labor that begins with daybreak and ends
with backbreak.
 
Q: What's the difference between inlaws and outlaws?  
A: Outlaws are wanted.

"In certain kinds of writing, particularly in art
criticism and literary criticism, it is normal to
come across long passages which are almost completely
lacking in meaning."(George Orwell)

 

Do U like Satire - Part 2

Men are like linoleum floors. Lay 'em right and you can walk all over them for thirty years. ~ Betsy Salkind

The only reason they say 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats. ~ Jean Kerr

I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage. ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. ~ Jeff Foxworthy

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. ~ Prince Philip

Courtesy: Martha Northrup

Laugh as U enjoy the Humour

A paramedic was being interviewed on
TV. "What was your most unusual and
challenging 9-1-1 call?"
"Recently we got a call from the church
at 11th and Walnut. A frantic usher was
very concerned that during the sermon an
elderly man passed out in a pew and
appeared to be dead. The usher could find
no pulse and there was no noticeable
breathing."
"What was so unusual and demanding about
this particular call?"
"We carried out four guys before we found
the one who was dead."

"You look glum. Whats wrong?"
"They called in a management team and gave
everyone in the office an aptitude test to
see what they were best suited for."
"Yeah, so what's the problem with that?"
"It turns out that I am best suited for
unemployment."