LOUD

Many years ago, when my 9 year old daughter was 3, we went
to our usual Sunday morning church service. We were seated
and waiting for the service to begin, when this woman walked
by us in a really bright, gaudy dress. My husband, who never
says anything about anyone, even made a comment about how
"loud" the dress was.

After the service was over, we were standing outside the
church chatting with another couple. I couldn't see my
daughter and then I noticed her standing right next to
(practically on top of) the woman with the dress. When I
asked her what she was doing, she said "I'm trying to hear
this dress mom. Dad said it was really loud, but I haven't
heard it make a peep yet."

Everyone within earshot, with the exception of my husband
and the woman in the dress burst out laughing. My husband
wanted to crawl in a hole, and I have to say I never saw
that particular dress worn again.

Courtesy: Pastor Tim.

Idiots Galore

My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank.   Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers.   One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"

I was sitting in my science class, when the teacher commented that the next day would be the shortest day of the year. My lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and clapping. I explained that the amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of time. Needless to say, she was very disappointed.

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.  She asked the individual behind the counter for "minimal lettuce."  He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.

Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.

Whose Color Is Real

When I was born, I was BLACK,
When I grew up, I was BLACK,
When I went in the sun, I stayed BLACK,
When I got cold, I was BLACK,
When I was scared, I was BLACK,
When I was sick, I was BLACK,
And when I die, I'll still be BLACK.

NOW, You 'white' folks......

When you're born, you're PINK,
When you grow-up, you're WHITE,
When you go in the sun, you get RED,
When you're cold, you turn BLUE,
When you're scared, you're YELLOW,
When you get sick, you're GREEN
When you bruise, you turn PURPLE,
And when you die, you look GREY.
 

So why y'all be callin' us

COLORED Folks?

Courtesy: Martha Northrup