Sure way to find parking space!

Wayne was returning home from a business trip, bags in hand,and slowly making his way to his vehicle in the crowded airport garage. Suddenly a large dark car screeched to a  stop in front of Wayne, and the driver pointed menacingly at  him. "Get in," the driver ordered. "I'll take you to your car."
 
Startled, Wayne took a step backward. "Ah ... no thanks," he answered. "I can get there myself."
"No!" the man barked back as he threw open his passenger side door. "Get In!"
 
Wayne's eyes now darted around the garage, hoping to find a security guard.
 
Just then, the driver's face softened. "Please," he said,
"I've been driving up and down for two hours. I can't find a space to park and I want yours."
 
Courtesy: Becky Day.

Hilarious Sharp Shooters - 2

When I told the doctor about my loss of memory,
he made me pay in advance.

"Where did you get those big eyes?"
"They came with the face."

I went alone on our honeymoon.
My wife had already seen Niagara Falls.

But the psychiatrist really helped me a lot. I would never answer the
phone, because I was afraid. Now I answer it whether it rings or not.

It was love at first sight.
Then I took a second look !!

Spelling Mistake!

Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.

Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"