Pedestrians

My husband works in the fuels squadron at an Air Force base,
and many of his co-workers complain about the superior
attitude of the pilots.
 
One day the fuel guys decided to put things in perspective
for the proud pilots. They all came to work wearing shirts
inscribed, "Without fuel, pilots are pedestrians."
 
 Courtesy: Amber Anderson (via Reader's Digest)

LAUGH AND ENJOY THE HUMOUR

A student walks into a car showroom and after a long talk with a salesman, he picks the car he wants to buy.
-- ``Do you have the cash to pay for it, Sir, or will you be making a hire purchase agreement?''
-- ``I'll buy it on HP, thanks.''
So the student dictates his details to the salesman, who fills in the HP application. Then, to the salesman's astonishment, he signs at the bottom of the form with a big cross and a little cross.
-- ``What are these crosses?''
-- ``Well, the big cross is my name and the little cross is `BSc (Agriculture).'''

AMAZING AND HILARIOUS IF TRUE - LAST PART

"This project is so important we can't let things that are more important interfere with it."  (Advertising/ Marketing manager, United Parcel Service)

“Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule."  (Plant Manager, Delco Corporation)

"No one will believe you solved this problem in one day. We've been working on it for months.  Now go act busy for a few weeks and I'll let you know when it's time to tell them."  (R&D supervisor, Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing/ 3M Corp)

Quote from the Boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what I say." (Marketing executive, Citrix Corporation) 

My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday. When I told my Boss, he said she died on purpose so that I would have to miss work on the busiest day of the year. He then asked if we could change her burial to Friday. He said,"That would be better for me."
(Shipping executive, FTD Florists)

"We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going to discuss it with the employees." (Switching Supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division)

Courtesy: Martha Northrup