Wednesday 14 May 2014

No extra please!

The CEO was scheduled to speak at an important
convention, so he asked his top engineer to write him
a punchy, 20-minute speech.

When the CEO returned from the big event, he
was furious. "What's the idea of writing me an
hour-long speech?!? Half the audience walked
out before I finished."


The engineer replied. "I wrote you a 20-minute
speech. I also gave you the two extra copies
you asked for."

Monday 12 May 2014

SOB!

An elderly gentleman was reviewing his records at the hospital
where I work. He expressed some concern at one notation. "I
know I'm a bit difficult at times, but I didn't realize I was
that bad," he said to me apologetically. "I hope I didn't
offend anyone."

 

Then I explained the acronym in question meant "Short Of Breath".

Saturday 10 May 2014

Key Trouble!

A friend of mine recently went on a trip and had to stop at a rest area on the Interstate. She took her keys, left her purse and cell phone in her car, and went to the restroom.
When she returned, her remote wouldn't unlock the door and she panicked. "What am I going to do? My cell phone is still in the car and I can't call Onstar!"

Another traveler nearby overhearing this asked, "Have you tried the key?"